New Olympic Sport

Corruption will be introduced as an Olympic sport, starting with the 2008 Summer Olympic games in Beijing, China. The International Olympic Committee decided in 2002 that only eleven nations would compete in the 2008 tournament, although twelve nations are sending teams to Beijing to compete for the team gold medal (the Sri Lankan team bribed Chinese officials).

Each nation held its own domestic tournament to select the most corrupt, dishonest, and degenerate people who would represent their country in Beijing. For example, in the Philippines, the national team tryouts involved getting stopped by a traffic policeman, and seeing who could bribe their way out of paying the ticket using the least amount of cash. The U.S. National Team consists of Dick Cheney's T-Mobile Fave 5. In India, officials simply picked up the first few people they saw.

"ESPN Play Of The Week"
The inclusion of corruption as an official Olympic event has caused the sport's popularity to skyrocket worldwide. This has been especially evident in the United States. Modeled on the And1 MixTape Basketball Tour, the Evian Corruption MixTape Tour will be traveling across North America this Summer. In each city the tour stops, it will rob the local community of their retirement funds and give money to the local Republican Party office. Currently, the players on the Evian tour include:

* Goldin Parashoot
* Kredit Derivativ
* Insidah Tradezz
* C-Mless Webb
* Halliburt Reynolds
* UChicago Dreamz
* DJ Neoclassical-Economics